The benefits of never winning

As dutifully linked below by our good friend Kevin, the AP reported today that Pirates starting pitcher Ross Ohlendorf has found an unusual way to spend his uniquely long offseasons: by getting a real job.  Ohlendorf, a Princeton graduate, managed to snag an offseason (unpaid) internship with the U.S. Department of Agriculture, even in this tough economy.  In truth, Ohlendof's gig doesn't sound all that exciting (especially compared to, you know, professional sports).  As told by the AP, it sounds pretty much like what normal people do every day:

Ohlendorf . . . shares a small office with another USDA employee.  His work is mainly focused on animal identification—the nationwide tracking system intended to pinpoint an animal's location after a disease is discovered.

But being so unusually productive has Ohlendorf the talk of the Pirates' locker room.  Fellow pitcher Zach Duke, though not inclined to Ohlendorf's "geek[y]" ways, sounds like he may just jump on board:

"I'm kind of jealous of him after talking to him because he told me he's doing all this stuff, getting to meet people" like Michelle Obama. Duke said he's spending his own offseason "just kind of hanging out."

His current internship is apparently not Ohlendorf's only distraction from the Pirates, either—he also partners with his father in running the family's longhorn business, even managing its website during the season.  So, while Ohlendorf does take time "most days" to work out, you gotta ask:  Should the Pirates start pitching themselves as a part-time baseball team for those like Ohlendorf or Duke who may want to do more with their lives?  Had Ohlendorf been in the playoffs this year he never would have been able to interview for, let alone accept, his current job, which began in October.

And what a waste that would be for who Tim Kurkjian has described as the smartest player in baseball.  It's a good thing for Ohlendorf—and for the country—that there exists a team like the Pirates, who will never  bottle up too much of his time with one pursuit.

Reggaeton Birthday Parties Don't Come Cheap

And more vital information.....

Sammy Sosa apparently owes Dominican businessman Carim Abu Nabaa lots of money, including $10,000 "for getting Reggaeton singer Don Omar to perform at Sosa's 41st birthday party."  Not to worry, Sosa's financial troubles will end soon, as he has signed on to play the lead in the upcoming sequel to the 1995 hit film Powder.

Neely Tucker profiles college football guru Phil Steele in today's Washington Post.  Apparently the country's leading college football analyst has not attended a college football game in over 30 years.  The piece includes an awesomely creepy picture of Steele jumping on a trampoline with his daughter.

The collapsed real estate market has been rough on professional athletes.  This story really makes you feel for Tony Richardson, Keyon Dooling, and friends -- that is, until you remember that they all make millions of dollars.  Yeah, that must help. 

Last Thanksgiving, Jaguars reserve wide receiver Mike Sims-Walker considered quitting football following the tragic deaths of his best friend and his father.  Sims-Walker has emerged this season as one of the league's top wideouts for Jacksonville. 

Brady Quinn and Chinedum Ndukwe, former high school, college, and Bookstore Basketball teammates, will face each other Sunday for the first time since the practice fields at Notre Dame.

I include this article solely because of its hilarious headline and subheadline:
     
    Connection Formed Bond
    Belichick, Payton hooked up in '07

I'm very mature.

Pirates righty and Princeton grad Ross Ohlendorf is not your typical mediocre starting pitcher.

Amazing story out of Seattle: 80 year-old Bob Dolphin is running in Sunday's marathon.  It will be Bobs 456th marathon.  And he didn't run his first one until age 51.  This would make me feel bad about myself, but, luckily, I did 15 minutes on my Gazelle this morning.

Finally, legendary Yankees PA announcer Bob Sheppard officially retired Wednesday at age 99.  Sheppard's career with the Yankees stretched from DiMaggio to Melky, and his unforgettable voice introduced baseball to generations of Yankees fans.....

Links O'Plenty

For your Thanksgiving reading pleasure...

Allen Iverson announced his retirement from the NBA yesterday. I'm not sure what I find more amusing: the fact that Iverson announced his retirement on Stephen A. Smith's website or that Iverson wrote, "I still have tremendous love for the game, the desire to play, and a whole lot left in my tank. I feel strongly that I can still compete at the highest level." It sounds like Allen is very excited for retirement....

The usually annoying Bill Plaschke tells the moving story of USC running back Stafon Johnson's relationship with his mother in today's LA Times.

The great Joe Posnanski predicts which under-30 MLBers will make it to Cooperstown. I'm thankful for the fact that Posnanski excludes the odious Dustin Pedroia from the list.

The Daily News tells the sad story of ex-Knick Dean Meminger's battle with drug addiction.

Notre Dame Athletic Director Jack Swarbrick gives a candid interview to The Quad, the New York Times' excellent college sports blog. Swarbrick offers an interesting/troubling answer to a question about Notre Dame possibly joining a conference somewhere down the road.

The Washington Post has a lengthy, but interesting obituary on former Wizards and Capitols owner Abe Pollin.

Lastly, go Aggies....

The Buck List NFL Pick Off: Week 12

Green Bay (-11) at Detroit [Green Bay 34, Detroit 12]
John: Detroit (1)
Ryan: Green Bay (5)
Kevin: Green Bay (2)

Brilliant Prediction (Ryan): The Packers, winners of two straight, take their show on the road where winning streaks don't exactly go to die. It would take a Thanksgiving miracle for the Lions to cover much less win, with rookie Matthew Stafford nursing an injury to his non-throwing shoulder. Even if the gutsy Stafford manages to start, don't look for him under center by the second half against a Packers defense playing inspired football and a Lions offensive line yielding the 5th most sacks in the league. At least we'll get our fill of Fox's loveable robotic turkey. Take the Pack and change the channel.

Oakland (+13.5) at Dallas [Oakland 7, Dallas 24]
John: Oakland (4)
Ryan: Dallas (2)
Kevin: Oakland (1)

Brilliant Prediction (Kevin): Oakland’s offense looked much better last week with new starter Bruce Gradkowski at the helm in a win over the Bengals. Can the Raiders pull off another upset this week? Probably not, but the combination of Romo’s sore back and Oakland’s stellar cornerbacks should keep the game close.

NY Giants (-6) at Denver [New York 6, Denver 26]
John: Giants (2)
Ryan: Giants (1)
Kevin: Giants (3)

Brilliant Prediction (John): Kyle Orton will be back starting for Denver, but the reeling Broncos will need far more than Orton to keep up with a Giants team that, at least for a half, once again looked like a Super Bowl contender last week.  Don't get me wrong, Orton's had a fairly good season, but I'm pretty sure that the last time his return meant much of anything to a football team was in the fourth quarter of the 2004 Ohio State game.  And let's just say I'm not encouraged when Justin Tuck is out there saying things like this: "I eat every day; I am not worried about necessarily eating on Thanksgiving Day. Hopefully I get to eat some quarterbacks."  I made my mistake picking the Broncos last week (and oh what a mistake it was), so I'll atone for my sins this time around.

Tampa Bay (+12) at Atlanta [Tampa Bay 17, Atlanta 20]
John: Tampa (1)
Ryan: Atlanta (1)
Kevin: Atlanta (1)

Brilliant Prediction (Ryan): After an emotionally draining overtime loss to the Giants last week at the Meadowlands, the Falcons are 5-5 and officially in must-win mode. 12's a big number, but too many signs point to an Atlanta cover. Tampa Bay rookie quarterback Josh Freeman has yet to start a game outside of Florida, and the Georgia Dome -- which hasn't hosted the Falcons since November 8th -- should cause him some problems. The favorite in this rivalry is 5-1 against the spread in the last six meetings. Make it 6-1 after Sunday's matchup in Atlanta.

Red Sox Targeting Wrong Superstar

The New York Daily News reported today that the Boston Red Sox are “putting on a full court press” in an attempt to acquire Toronto ace Roy Halladay. To get the deal done, the Daily News speculated that the Sox would have to give up Clay Bucholz and top pitching prospect Casey Kelly. Despite that heavy price tag, the move seems like an obvious one for the Red Sox. Halladay, the American League’s premier pitcher over the last decade, would join Josh Beckett and Jon Lester to form baseball’s most formidable trio of starting pitchers.

But is a Halladay trade the best move the Sox could make this offseason? It would seem ridiculous to claim otherwise. Over the past two seasons, Halladay has won 37 games and posted a sub 2.80 ERA. Still, if the Sox want to trade away their top prospects for the immediate upgrade of a proven veteran, Theo Epstein and co should pursue a different American League star – Detroit’s Miguel Cabrera.

Cabrera offers greater value to the Red Sox in several ways. Despite finishing third in the American League in runs scored in 2009, the Sox need to upgrade their offense. Specifically, the Red Sox lack a fearsome power hitter in the middle of their lineup. Kevin Youkilis, Dustin Pedroia, and Victor Martinez are all quite good, but they are not the type of players that opposing teams must account for and pitch around consistently. Most championship teams feature one or two monster hitters in the middle of their lineup. The 2004 and 2007 Red Sox had Manny and Ortiz. The Yankees have Teixeira and ARod. The Phillies have Utley and Howard. As valuable as Youkilis is, the Red Sox do not have a superstar, middle of the lineup, power hitter.

Cabrera would fill that void. For his career, Cabrera has produced the following 162 game averages: 33 HR, 117 RBI, .311 BA, .383 OBP, .542 SLG. The addition of Cabrera would elevate Boston’s offense to an elite level that is currently only occupied by the Yankees and the Phillies. Boston needs this type of offensive upgrade more than the boost Halladay would provide to the pitching staff. With Beckett and Lester at the top, the Red Sox have one of the most formidable starting rotations in baseball without Halladay. The offense – not the pitching staff – let the Red Sox down in their divisional series loss to the Angels. The Red Sox scored just one run in the first two games in Anaheim, paving the way for an Angels sweep.

The argument for Cabrera over Halladay strengthens when looked at from a long-term perspective. Halladay’s contract expires after the 2010 season, and any deal for Halladay will have to include a contract extension. Considering his resume, Halladay will command a Johan Santana/CC Sabathia type deal. The numbers will probably end up somewhere in the neighborhood of 100 million over five years. But Halladay, who turns 33 in May and has over 2,000 career innings pitched, has significantly more miles on him than Santana and Sabathia did when they signed their mega-deals. The Sox could get stuck paying 20 million a year for a pitcher on the downslide of his career.

Meanwhile, the 26 year-old Cabrera has just entered his prime years as a hitter and has six seasons and 126 million left on his deal. Cabrera’s contract will be up before he turns 34. Thus, if the Red Sox were to acquire Cabrera, they would not be on the hook for any of his post-prime years.

Cabrera does not come without baggage, though. In the final week of last season, with Detroit embroiled in a fierce divisional race, Cabrera was detained by police as a result of a drunken domestic dispute with his wife. The slugger has struggled with weight problems in the past. The Red Sox would have to keep a close watch on Cabrera, but the chance to acquire baseball’s best hitting talent not named Pujols greatly outweighs the risks. Plus, the Red Sox have some recent experience with a talented, but troubled slugger. And that worked out pretty well for them.